Change can come more easily than we might ever have imagined. The big question is, do we want to change?
That is the question. "Even birth has many steps. It begins with leaving the womb; then it means leaving the mother's breast, mother's lap, mother's hands. Each new ability, the ability to talk, to walk, to eat, means at the same time leaving a former state." -- Erich Fromm
"At the core of our nature is a dilemma - to change or to stay the same?" -- R. Kowalski
"Every human being has both sets of forces within him. One set clings to safety and defensiveness out of fear, tending to regress backward, hanging on to the past, afraid to grow, afraid to take chances, afraid to jeopardize what he already has, afraid of independence, freedom, separateness.
"The other set of forces impels him forward toward wholeness of Self and uniqueness of Self, towards full functioning of all his capacities, towards confidence in the face of the external world at the same time that he can accept his deepest, real, unconscious Self." -- Abraham Maslow
Some of our choices may involve:
Stability | vs. | Change |
Security | vs. | Opportunity |
Safety | vs. | Growth |
Reason | vs. | Intuition |
Having | vs. | Being |
Power-over | vs. | Power-to |
Things | vs. | Processes |
Away-From | vs. | Toward |
Caution | vs. | Enthusiasm |
Cynicism | vs. | Possibility |
Bondage | vs. | Freedom |
The Good News
The Good News is that these pairs of opposites need not be our only choices. They are neither universal nor absolute. We can preserve stability in some respects while changing in others. We can maintain security while we take opportunities. We can grow safely.
There comes a time when we truly want to change, when we are perhaps even compelled to do so. Life's challenges may become so powerful, that to not-change would be to remain stuck and deny ourselves the greatest joys and success in life.
"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." -- Anais Nin
More Good News
When we've decided to change, when we are ready to undertake what needs to be done, when it's time to put decisions into action, change can come more easily than we might ever have imagined.
"It's nearly impossible to crack a green nut. But when it is brown, the slightest tap will do it." -- Ramakrishna